I just want to get to the point in our relationship where I can get on top of her and fart and we can both laugh...not just me.
nothing cures the holiday blues like an open bar
1. Sorry about making it snow. 2. If it left a mess, I will be over to clean it. 3. Can that fire extinguisher still be used? If not, I'll buy a new one. 4. I just wanted to make it snow!
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
No she left bc the of pic I have of my mom in my bathroom. She thought it was my gf
Why the hell do you have a picture of YOUR MOM in your bathroom?!?!
Best part of Friday afternoon drinking? Having ping pong balls thrown into my cleavage.
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
We were getting fries and you hopped the counter and yelled "WELCOME TO GOOD BURGER HOME OF THE GOOD BURGER" and threw up
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
Okay, first we buy a pirate outfit and then we get drunk, you in or you out?
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
Its 7am I'm awake still drunk, there is food, random clothing and road cone in my room. I can't decide if this is a failure or a success???
He showed up with a hearse full of beer and is currently shooting pumpkins with a flare gun. Who gives a shit if he's a furry. We need to party with him more often.
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
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