I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
I met the friendliest cop last night
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
He puked over my shoulder into the toilet. The guy in the next stall sounded totally appalled.
You know how I know she's ugly? 97% of her profile pics are flowers or animals. And what do we know about pretty people and the Internet?
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
I owe you an apology, I was appointed captain of this sexy fuckship and I fell asleep at the helm.
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
You’re like one of those doomsday preppers, but for your vagina
just drove past - why are you walking towards the shop in your pyjamas?
Can't talk, on a quest for bacon.
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