Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
I just spent the last two hours on the phone with Emily trying to explain to her how to finger herself.
he needs to stop telling all his friends what my queefs sound like. its getting awkward to be around people who can quote my vagina.
I just got fire extinguished by his roommate while we were having sex. That's just taking cock blocking to a whole new level.
Look I'm sorry I shaved your cat, but get over it.
My roommate just called. He's in Miami and has no idea how he got there. He also has a ticket to Buenos Aires that he can't explain. I figured you'd have the explanation.
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
Nothing says "welcome to Denver" like a hot 18 year old giving you directions to the dispensary and ending up blowing you in the backseat
I've been asked to reupholster their slam-couch so I found some off-cuts of medical-grade, hermetically sealed fabric. She'll be slammed upon for generations to come.
You wanna get laid? Be a female for once and stop bending nails to impress guys.
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
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