i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
I drank 13 shots. Which is unlucky. Which is why i threw up.
you threw up because you drank 13 SHOTS
I am too drunk to make real decisions. I had pop rocks all over my ass earlier. This is not a joke.
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
This is the point in ur life where u should realize there's nothing left but a spiral of shame
I should but I don't. All I see is an escalator of success
I'm pretty sure at any given moment you could wring out my liver and get a couple of shots of jäger.
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
I think i'm the first person to get kicked out of a club while completely sober. Come outside please!!
I still judge her for aggressively trying to get coke from my date but pretty cool that she's a black belt
my vagina can't handle any more of our 4 day long smash bash. it should be like a holiday or something. should only happen once a year.
He went down on me for like 30 min and honestly half the time I thought about those videos where people can smash watermelons with their legs and I just wanted to do that to his skull
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
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