fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
He just said "fuck you" to the bowl he's eating things out of
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
If you wake up soonish don't worry. I took your dog to burger king and now we're going to see some nice girls.
We see some guy emerge from the forest on the island this morning, alone, in only a snuggie. Morning shots and bagels on us for the number one walk of shame.
Only he would come to a strip club and talk about an internship with Walt Disney during a lap dance.
You were ¾ of the way through the first pitcher of margaritas then you turned to me and said "Wow I can barely taste the vodka!" And then…….
...Then...
Then I told you margaritas are made with tequila not vodka. You whipped the pitcher at the wall and ordered another one
No. Not going out tonight. No. It's Tuesday. Xanax and Full House Tuesday.
Please send pictures of any nice new years ladies you run across in town, as I've forgotten what women look like.
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
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