DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
And by that I mean I told her the plot of the first batman movie as my life and it took her like 20 minutes to figure it out
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
$100 bras are my way of telling my boobs that I love and appreciate them, and all the metaphorical doors they have opened for me.
No. More. Tequila. Even the hot dog guy felt bad for me and you know that guy has seen some crazy shit.
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
I just took the batteries out of the xbox remote so she could replace the dead ones in her vibrator If that's not love I don't know what is
"We hooked up and in the morning he emailed me his mix tape"
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
Randomize
