So I fucked an Aussie broad with huge feeders last nite 2x... Before banging her she was blowin me & I thought: "SHE IS GOIN DOWN-UNDER ON ME". Laughed out loud
this other lifeguard and I are actually considering paying a kid to shit in the pool
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
Woke up in a different state, wearing only a bk crown. My boxers are in a tree and I think I went to the hospital last night.....
I told you not to do acid with the girl who works the late shift at 7-11
Just realized my talking to the tv hockey voice is same as my sex voice. Life just got a whole lot weirder.
I woke up to the sound of a beer can being opened. I love him already
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
Its okay I walked into your house, searched for my wallet in your purse, and took a shot of Tequilia all without eye contact, right?
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
Went to a date party without a date and had a threesome wooops
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
Thank you for always being there for me.
Sorry wrong derek... Do u have any weed?
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