I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
You realize if you die tommorow, the last memory i'll ever have of you is your ballsack on skype
We were hooking up and you crawled into bed with us, because you had lost your phone and didn't "want to be alone at a time like this."
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
My dad walked in on me masturbating in my own apartment.....my own apartment!!
The night took a downhill turn when he started using a butter knife as a spoon to drink his cosmo
Sometimes you gotta take the crosseyed stripper. fuck it
He offered me a ride home but i walked. He lives by an elementary school so a 10 yr old safety officer helped me across the street during my walk of shame
I'm not leaving bed today. And i guess my drunken ass last night hit my roommate in the face with a tiki torch then proceeded to cry while carrying around a picture of he who must not being name. I'm a piece of work.
Some guy just showed up at my door to return my bikini top. EXPLAIN NOW
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
I got whiskey, so I think the blizzard and I are at an even match
Why'd you print out every dick pic you've ever received and tape them to the bathroom walls?
Had a moment of weakness, slept with my ex last night
So that's why our room smells like tequila and shame.
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
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