He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
I hate him and his pretentious your-sleeping-in-the-wet-spot look.
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
This is gonna be the kind of weekend where if it involves putting on pants, it ain't happening.
it's not rock bottom until you fall down an escalator on the way home from a hookup and have to have you dad come pick your drunkass up at 3am. Adulthood.
He referred to our sex as "an Olympic event." My tits are bruised.
I hope every time you eat hashbrowns you think about me, the awesome sex we had and how great we could have been.
Hey! Its not the first time I've been eaten out in a bridesmaids dress in a church by a groomsman!
Jesus christos I come home and am treated like my vagina is made of gold
Either that or it dispenses candy
I’m going down on him like an Oompah Loompah on roller skates.
That makes no sense, but good luck
Randomize
