i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
Well we ran into the cornfields when the cops got there. We'd been hiding in there for 45 mins when he asks me "So this wasn't exactly how I'd planned this but I thought I'd ask. How do you feel about oral sex?"
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
new rule: i'm not touching his penis until he takes me out to dinner.
you know, if you actually abided by that rule there would be many more successful restauranteurs in ohio.
My mom and I are having a "yay I don't have herpes" shopping trip day
Me+graduation party+hammered drunk+polish horseshoes in the dark= black eye, crying, pissed, passed out in my dress... How was your weekend?
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
ALERT: Turns out when I'm drunk I turn into a clepto. I just found keys, a ketchup bottle, and sweatshirt in my backpack that don't belong to me. If yours, come collect from me. I'm still drunk in the back of biology lecture.
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
I just want you to know that I'm, like, 45% hard right now.
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
He facetimed with his son when he was still inside of me. If that's not a dedicated dad I don't know what is
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
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