So when jo picked me up from the bar I kept apologizing and kept telling her "I'm just a wittle donut"
im getting a BJ in a closet
and a penguin just handed me a bong
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
Nothing quite says America like barbecue and beer at 9 in the morning.
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
St Patricks Day is not the day you decide to have a sober epiphany.
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
LSHMSFOAIDMT = laughing so hard my sombrero falls off and I drop my taco.
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
I can't tell if I'm getting better at doing my online spanish hw drunk or if my teacher is just grading on creativity. Either way that senoritas gettin an applebees gift card when i graduate.
Mimosa dick, like his cousin Whiskey dick, is just as ineffective but a lot more fun to be around
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
Randomize
