you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
Note: footlong is not the password to the subway wi fi network.. p.s- im super high
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
I told her the maid must have stolen all my condoms. She bought it
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
Was just told that I was slipped 2 hits of acid in my in flight drink before takeoff. 8 hours to Germany wish me luck
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
Look, all I can tell ya is I want to drink wine out of a bottle while you eat me. It would be the most fantastic end to finals week. Maybe ever.
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
He just made my one night stand pancakes for breakfast. And I thought living with my ex was going to be weird.
You cried for a while then lifted lots of weights then cady's ex put glitter on your tits and then you took a nap. I got you pizza and brought you home. Nothing too exciting.
Literally, and I mean LITERALLY as in "not to be confused with a casual hyperbole", LITERALLY the day we broke up she slept with 3 different guys that night.
1) It's nice to see that the whole "English Major" thing is upping the quality of your rants 2) Have you considered that your dick was the cork holding her sluttiness in?
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
My husband was abducted by a group of disco dancers in the parde and danced off down the street. If you see him, tell him to Hustle on home and clean the cat box. #MardiGras
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
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