So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
you just kept swimming in circles and whenever someone would try and coax you out you would scream "i CANNOT drown, my brother is the supervisor of a water park!!
Look, all I'm sayin is $2 boilermakers and an expense account are probably a bad mix…
I woke up with a Nike swoosh shaved into my chest hair. my friend got 3 stitches. my phone had a text that simply read "fuck you". I say it was a good party.
My cleaning lady broke my bubbler. It's awkward between us now.
Why?
Because she knows I do drugs and I know she's a clumsy bitch.
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
Whenever I think to myself, "I don't work for a bunch of hours"... It's shot time?
Just reminding you that you are currently drunk spooning a chair saying it "loves you unconditionally". No more rum.
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
this is a preemptive text before you call me freaking out: i have your keys and your car is parked safely a block down from your apartment.
you are a goddess
You cannot tell me you don't have a problem while crying pantsless on a stranger's sofa bed.
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