My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
Yea I just took my 1st pregnancy test. Turns out I am just fat. Also I haven't been with anyone in 3 months, which is clearly making me crazy.
We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
Sorry for walking in on you guys last night. FYI I have a bruise on my forehead from having the door slammed in my face. I deserved it.
I'm tangled in a fishing net down at the harbor. This has nothing to do with Captain Morgan. Bring wirecutters.
She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"
Drinking vodka straight out of a beer bottle because I don't want to be judged. Not my best idea and not my worst.
He actually offered up a silent prayer thanking God for my "tremendous ass." You tell me how my night is going.
I thought I was pretty much sober now but then I realized I've been eating scrambled eggs with my hands...
Just found out i over drew my checking account on a 711 hot dog
Do u remember buying that
I remember eating it on the curb like a drunken hobo
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
Randomize
