Booty call?
Dude you don't even follow my twitter
JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
Is it sad that I find it completely normal that I just took batteries out of a vibrator to put them in a pencil sharpener so I could do homework?
I find this completely acceptable.
He just said he wasn't going to drink on Saturday because he was drinking on Thursday and Friday...we need new friends.
Dude. Hurry up. They just blessed the tequila.
The fact that I am sitting home writing a resume while you're out inducing vomiting makes me feel like way more of an adult than I'm ready to be.
Did not foresee holding down food at work today to be a struggle today
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
Although a guy bought me a shot of fireball last wknd and I told him he wouldn't even get half a handjob for that and walked away so don't tell me I don't have standards
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
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