There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
So, I just pissed in her shampoo bottle. Hope she enjoys a late golden shower from me.
Friend I haven't seen in almost a year just IMed me to let me know that my mom stuck her boob out the window on the freeway at her.
Her mom responded by mooning my mother. I really don't know what's worse.
he told my vagina that he was looking forward to meet it
Just saw a cop issuing a DUI. At 3 pm. It's definitely the start of winter break.
Just took a final in the room where I lost my virginity. I think it was god luck.
Tell me right now I did the right thing by not fucking my sick gf at 3 am with her family home... Tell me my balls hurt for noble reasons.
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
She was humming during sex. After I asked her why, she said it was her sex theme music
Have you seen Dave? He's not on top of the bar anymore but I found his shirt.
Is it socially acceptable to be blind drunk at half five on a Monday afternoon?
Which pub are you in?
Why wake up next to a guy when you can wake up next to a bag of chips and not have to worry about what kind of std you might've caught
Is "You've never made me cum." an acceptable breakup line?
How likely is it that we can see each other tomorrow night? I want to shave my legs in good faith but it's cold outside and my bathroom is drafty.
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
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