That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
i havee beer in my backseat and a glow in the dark condom in my cleaveage.
you're going for the gold here.
READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
u know ur in oregon when the cop tells u to keep the beer cans he made u pour out so u can recycle them
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
i know i should keep better track of the things that i put in your vagina but i've put so many things in there it's hard to keep track
He said I took his samurai sword off his wall and proceeded to jump off his porch at people coming home from the bar.
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
just reached the point where my breast implants paid from themselves in free drinks.
I don't even care that it's before church. I feel like God actually wants me to have this shower beer.
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
Randomize
