the guy working at the drive-thru just asked me if i wanna bang after he gets off work tonight.
given your current drought situation, im genuinely curious to know what your answer was
i told him maybe and gave him my number. sad? probably. but even if the sex is bad maybe i'll get a free burger out of it
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
woke up to a family dragging me under their beach umbrella, they poured water on me bc they "thought I was dead" then fed me quesadillas and nursed me back to health... gotta love Cabo
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
That's probably when I climbed a tree and told everyone I was an ornament
You said too many real things and now I need to crawl back inside my protective fort of sarcasm, being an asshole, and sass
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
Randomize
