U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
it's like your virginity...sometimes you have to pretend like it's still there
you were eating the carrots out of my guinea pig's cage and saying that you needed them more than they ever would.
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
Every time you come over you bleed on everything. I'm not calling Verizon again asking if blood is considered water damage.
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES?
ever had one of those days where you say fuck it and lick the inside of a bag of chips
if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story.
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
Election Day 2016 shall forever live in infamy as the day when I hobbled through my neighborhood, mascara melting down my face, wearing one slipper and a cast, blood and cum all over my skirt, carrying a box of wine, and no one even noticed.
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
You hear the wildest shit in a Walmart bathroom.
Randomize
