Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
She wouldn't go home with me cause I forgot her name. I didn't realize it would matter after she danced with her vagina on my face
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
Wedding cake is always the best dance partner. In the corner. With a jack and coke. And while I'm crying. Listening to "Almost Paradise".
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
you put your hands over the taxi driver's eyes and shouted GUESS THE WAY TO THE CLUB
How many people can say they've shit on the floor of a five star hotel?
We have so much sex to catch up on
Major win last night. I traded my roommate two cigs for a six pack and a bag of beef jerky. This has been a Brian weekend update
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
He stole one of my good bras again. If I'm not getting laid I'm not putting with this shit. Also it's a walk of shame for you today, my car is suicidal again.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
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