One girl and one boy is just not enough.
ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
So I went outside my house this morning and basically my entire front lawn is covered in gummi bears... I think that involves you guys.
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
just left a line of flour and citric acid on the dresser for my roommate to find. teach that bastard to steal my coke!
i just figured out how to balance my wine bottle on my boobs so that i don't have to tip it with my hands...breathing has new meaning
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
If you had been home 20 minutes ago, you probably would've caught me masturbating, so it might be for the best.
But did u die
I found an onion in my purse
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
Guy just walked into the bathroom with only socks on and took a 5second shit. It is taking me longer to type this than for him to shit, wash hands, and leave the bathroom. WTF? Still wondering why he only had socks on.
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
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