some guy just got out of his chair quietly. Laid down on the floor and is now asleep in between rows in my lecture hall. He must have had a rough night.
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
His dick was as big as my arm. Giving him a handjob was like giving someone an Indian sunburn.
I would do laundry with you but I vaguely remember swallowing all my quarters last night as some kind of trick.
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
Yea I've gotten enough hickeys in my life to know what I'd look like with a neck tattoo. I think I'm getting a neck tattoo.
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
somehow getting chased by a bulldozer was NOT on my to-do list for today. just saying
Russell is lonely. He needs a companion.
You're lucky you have a monster cock or most people may just laugh at your penis' nickname.
I just got dumped by my fuck buddy. Now I have to have sex with my husband.
Randomize
