i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
the coke olympics were a bad idea. there's a tree uprooted in the front of my building.
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
you kept thanking chef boyardee for having pull tab cans
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
It's okay. My lingerie drawer is skanky enough for the two of us. Even across borders.
Yep I can make a seagull sound. It's identical. I tried it. They thought I was talking to them. It's pretty cool.
We have started to decorate penises.
Literally just one second of unclenched butt hole away from shitting my pants.
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
Thanks for making me a drunk burrito last night and cutting it into bite size pieces, I always knew you were a keeper.
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