No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
they duct taped my keg cup to my hand with my sister's phone number on it. I should be ok tonight.
You kept asking who was the good cop and who was the bad cop, you said you only wanted to talk to the good one
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
Is it possible to dent your eyeball? And how do you "accidentally" go cosmic bowling?
Look, as a friend I'm asking to see a picture of his tiny dick
you owe me at least a beer for the services my girlfriend just provided for you
By the time the opening band finished, she was already slurring, coming on to the gay couple next to us, and waving her panties in the air.
The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
Nothing screams fatass like a pizza that doesn't fit in your car
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
Seriously where are the good guys?
The friend zone.
He has the fingertips of a God
Randomize
