He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
The lack of pants and amount of productivity in my life right now is amazing.
If I die tonight. Just know that chicken I made fuckin ruled. Recipe: Chicken with a shitload oF spice
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
I woke up and he was just feeling up my stomach. I felt like buddha and he was rubbing my belly for good luck. never again.
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
Split a bottle of Johnny Walker and then decided to eat a shit ton of peanut butter. That was a rough bed to wake up in
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
I once left mine in my bra and I forgot and I didn't notice it was there until it vibrated.
Randomize
