I came back to the apartment and he was waiting for me, covered in mustard.
needless to say I left
So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
Tall, dark & handsome can suck my short, pale & awkward dick.
He asked me if I "almost moaned"
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
I'm really debating making a second facebook. Same name only with DRUNK at the end. That way I can keep the guys I only talk to when I'm drunk on that facebook and only go on it when im drunk.
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
we spent fifteen minutes trying to convince you that you weren't locked inside of your car
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
The lady at target couldn't scan my grocery item and just looked at me and said "just take it. I hate this fucking place". Best munchie adventure yet.
A dick pic is not a proper way to say I'm sorry
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
One day I'll learn not to get drunk on a plane. Today is not that day.
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
Randomize
