I knew you were gonna be a good wingman when the words "dibs on the chunky one" came out of your mouth.
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
Your mom just threw up on me. Please come home.
when im done with her im going to need you to carry me on your shoulders as i poses victoriously for all those who were within earshot
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
i just found my fake in the snow. LIFE IS AWESOME
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Randomize
