I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
She was trying to fuck the exchange student from France. His English is really bad and the music was loud so she just pointed to a beer bottle and then her vagina.
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
I sent him pictures of just me in my thong and he replied "you're so sweet, you make me feel special <3".... Oh.
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
Last thing I remember is ranting about hating pants. Woke up this morning pants less. Couldn't find them, decided to leave. Driving without pants is surprisingly liberating.
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
When he's drowning in your chest and he muffles out the words 'I just want to live here' that's a compliment right?
See, remember when you wanted to get an Ashley Madison account and I told you not to and you hated me? You. Are. Welcome.
I used to sleep with a guy on the USA rugby team... He stole my credit card and my Hitman DVD. I'm more upset about the Hitman DVD..
He's finally divorcing her, so naturally he tells me that we're not exclusive anymore. His penis 'wants what it wants' apparently.
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