So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
you were leaning against the vending machine asking if there was a shower you could puke in.
If people don't want my drunken phone call then TAKE YOUR FUCKING NUMER OFF OF FACEBOOK, like it's just that easy...
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
Why is there a keg in our kitchen? I'm not complaining but why is there a keg in our kitchen?
She spilled creme de menthe on her crotch and I told her she looked like a menstruating Vulcan (costume idea!). Obviously, I went home alone.
It's twenty thirteen and the rando and I bonded over the fact that we're both stil using flip phones. Of course I fucked him in the bathroom. It was the obvious thing to do.
Dude. Went to buy some jack and sailor Jerry, when the guy at the counter realized it was my birthday everybody in the store including the stoners and the elderly sang to me. Then they gave me shots of moonshine. 21st bday was a success
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
Hi please disregard the last text and if you'd like our entire interaction
Done
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
you made it your goal to puke in every planter around the union. you got most of them. im proud of you
The first thing my Christmas gift money is buying is a dildo.
Randomize
