There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
so i'm sitting in his room drinking tequila from the bottle and watching harry potter. he's jacking off to some porn a couple feet away from me. at one point i look over and see that he's watching me instead of the porn. please help me figure out how warped it is that i found that romantic
I didn't know it was possible to throw up mid-sneeze.
i ran around the party telling everyone that my favorite sexual position was also the only position that made me queef...i kept calling it the "double edged sword"
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
Most awkward car ride ever. Kid in the front seat was bawling, 2 in the backseat were ready to fight, and I was giving the last kid a handie. This needs to stop happening to us.
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
Why do I always miss the parties you're naked at?!
I get naked cuz your not there
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
I called you a cum goblin in my voicemail. I stand by it.
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
ya I went to the grocery store literally just for cheese and condoms
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
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