I'm cooking a can of baked beans on the baseboard heater. It is too early in the semester to be this poor.
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
Yeah well my vagina has expectations too but they don't get met all the time.
why the fuck are my pubes caked with bread crumbs?
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
It summer and it's getting a lot harder to hide sex bruises from my parents.
First world problems?
You sent me a picture of you holding a goat then asked me if I would have day sex
I couldn't drown my sorrows in an ocean of jack daniels. They may have scuba gear.
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
Someone younger than me just got married. Send help and vodka
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
Thank you for being so charming, but do you have syphilis?
Randomize
