as we were driving back from the frat house he pulled down his pants and convinced me his penis "wanted some air"
I got a bikini wax for the first time today and I think I now understand feminism.
I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.
I chased a girl up a staircase screaming because she had a cardboard cut out of James Dean which, at the time, I believed to my friend being held against his will
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
i'm not sure what happened last night.. i do remember the police calling me to find out where i was because apparently at some point i went missing? don't worry though. they found me
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
Randomize
