I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
Just pulled my keys, cell-phone and a pack of cigarettes out from between my cleavage. This one guy's face was priceless.
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
Apparently last night drunk me put my phone in a cup of beer to make it "fun scented".
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
Hooked up with an ex Playgirl model. I feel like the universe just high-fived me for staying sober.
Nothing like banging your nurse in the shower while staying in the hospital
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
they are cutting me off...little do they know I am making a 75 yr old man i named Herbert buy me drinks now...no shame at 11 am...
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