You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
fucking a dude
i mean: fucking a, dude
wow, that comma made all the difference there
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
he prob just wants to be friends and here i am photoshopping our kids
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
Let me put it this way - if I had a list of things I would like between my legs, she would rank below the cello I turned into firewood sophomore year.
how are things with the new girl?
good, we have nothing in common but she likes being choked
We found him in the backyard throwing shoes onto the roof yelling "WHO BRINGS CROCS TO A HOUSE PARTY?!"
Also I think I'm starting to get calluses on my hands from my level of sexual activity
I had to puke in a ditch beside a cow pasture and like 50 cows just stood there and watched. I could feel the judgment.
We were drunk waiting for tacos and I gave him a handy in the back of the Uber while giving the driver relationship advice. I think I'm handling the whole grad school thing alright.
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
Well he had a nice beard and it smelled good so there was no way I wasn’t going home with him.
Randomize
