i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
Get everyone into the kitchen. I need you all to witness me friend-zoning him. Just in case.
I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'
He's either jacking off or listening to Kanye West.
Yeah... I was considering changing that part but the boxed wine is non-negotiable.
I just used my AAA membership to fix a strippers flat tire in return for a lapdance...does that make me a bad person?
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
By the way I peed in a mug last night cause you were in the bathroom and im pretty sure it is still in the kitchen.
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
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