So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
My therapist said that she thinks i may have a sex addiction. I think she may be a terrible therapist.
Want me to drive you to Dr. Drew's sex rehab?
Nah, cause then i cant masturbate to that show anymore.
This might sound awkward, but can I borrow a dildo for class?
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
Think about if the incredible hulk and king kong had a retarded baby. That's the sound she made in my ear the entire time I fucked her.
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
I'd have paid money to see Cookie Monster playing with a vibrator
the last time I drank tequila I ended up riding your skateboard nude down the street... so yeah, I'll have a few shots.
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
Note to self don't stop having sex during an earthquake! I call it a 6.1 orgasm!
Jager makes that raccoon appear... The one that shits in a basket in my living room.
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
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