just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
I bought you a small gift as a preemptive apology for being a drunken slut tonight.
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
TRY TO UNDERSTAND I HAVE MAGIC POWERS HOLY FUCKING SHIT
I blacked out in the cab last night... Cant remember getting in the front door, also i got into bed with my grandma.
The squirrels were at the front door. Dude I swear..
He was tied up with the electrical tape and force fed wine from a box. It was never going to end well.
I woke up, topless, my car was parked funny so I threw on my hoodieto go fix it and found a jello shot in my pocket. where did I go last night?!
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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