3 deer just ran past us on the street. At least I get to see some tail tonight
Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
She calls me Shortcake and bites my ear. Trust me, I'm FINE with bein the secret lesbian lover.
Btw before you ask, the dr said there's no way shoving his dick that far down my throat is why i got laryngitis
Oh my god I just remembered I bit a stripper last night.
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
You called me a pussy and continued to eat an entire jar of peanut butter with only your hand.
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
he told me that I'm basically going to be the mom of the house when they move in...i like to see it as being a MILF without the responsibility of real children
Someone drank my pedialite!
YOU drank your pedialite. I watched you chase shots with it!
Randomize
