I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
Like, what's the customary waiting period to hookup with your newly single ex that you never stopped hooking up with?
I think his roommates are using word magnets to tell me that they can hear us. His fridge currently says, "Chris ate out naughty girl."
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
Drunk me obviously wants to fuck up my life
It's like I have an arch nemesis, and it's me
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
I accidentally told my mom "the reason I didn't answer your call is because my phone was in my pants, on the floor"
I had to reschedule my trainer meeting so now I'm just here eating hot pockets
I have in my possession one ukulele shaped package.
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
Anal on new furniture sounds like a quickest way to violate a warranty
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
Randomize
