Pappa wants mamma naked
Discovered the secret to willingly attending my 3-o'clock class. Ahoy, Cap'n.
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
Are you asking me on a date where we get shithoused and do some fingerpainting?
My synapses wont fire in a pattern that will process those facts
hahahaha what do we need the kangaroos for? please tell me we release them instead of doves
My walk of shame turned into having to get his dad to tow my best friends car out of the snowbank in his driveway
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
Nothing says hangover like being in the doctors office getting a tampon removed from deep inside
Am i obligated to tell my sister her girlfriend was my one night stand three months ago?
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
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