You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
she always made me post sex PB&Js it was like fucking a trashier Martha Stewart
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
Don't byou dare ruin egg salad by putting your penis in it that would be so sad.
Remind me to switch to jello when you decide to do shots off my ass. It's so much easier to clean than this pudding.
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
I know I've wanted to fuck him for the past month, but when you're that hungover, the only chemistry you have is with a pillow and a gallon of water.
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
Good news: you're over the drunk crying life phase. Bad news: now you're handy and violent. You were groping me from behind in front of the guy you like, then you put me in a headlock and swept the leg.
Doing laundry. My jeans from last night smell like chicken wings and motor oil.
Life without a bra equals bliss.
I just told my mormon professor that I was late because I was getting a STD test... good start to the day.
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
I just licked honey off my own tit. Is there anything about that which doesn't SCREAM single???
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