What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
dude I just sharted for the first time ever, kind of gross
well what did you think, shitting your pants would be fun
LMAO!!! just remembered you said this to me last night. "sometimes you post too many Jesus tweets. It's not that that's really bad... But I roll my eyes and you should know that."
I was drunk but it's true
This threesome is so guaranteed that dinner feels like a charade
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
Just called my mom. She definitely saw all those fb statuses so thanks for that.
Haha did she know what fisting meant?
Yeah. Which is upsetting in itself
Lots of rum and cokes. Bartender wore my underwear on his head. Lost my keys. Accidentily started a fight. DC is going to kill me
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
You also thought the cure to hiccups was drowning yourself (and you were right)
It's important to establish I slept with her BEFORE we officially became cousins-in-law.
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
Drunk me bought a cell phone last week and began texting sober me. The conversation between the two is still on going.
Randomize
