Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
It's amazing how much jurassic park has contributed to my life recently
the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
At one point we asked the guy to play "the lion sleeps tonight" with his bagpipes. Best version ever.
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
She just gave me a free latte.
Correction. She just have you a frothy, creamy path to that vagina.
please bring me a paper towel asap.
I was drinking wine in bed and spilt some on my chest.. And I cautiously guided it into my belly button but now I dont know what to do.
I THREW AWAY MY VIBRATOR BECAUSE IT INTIMIDATED HIM. WORST. DECISION. EVER
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
I'm not asking you to commit. I'm politely asking your penis to be my friend.
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
PSA Do not blow dry your junk.
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