glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
i spent 15 mins trying to take money out of ATM with my drivers license saying, "what the fuckkkk" everytime it didnt work
No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
Somewhere in this world my second husband is in 9th grade.
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
Need toilet paper. Napkins suck. Slowly running out of those two and the bleeding hasn't stopped. Your cat is next
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
Beer pong consisted of me throwing a ball at the wall and then falling over because moving my arm made me dizzy. I think our team lost.
theres chocolate ground into my couch, nerds candy all over the floor and cocaine on every surface. great memorial day weekend and yours?
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
try to milk me bitch
Randomize
