can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
Just got an Edible Arrangement my parents sent me for my birthday. Time to marinate some fruit in vodka.
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.
and by single i mean slutty
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
Her roommate texted her and told her that her cat died. Now she's double-fisting bottles of wine while howling and wailing her dead cat's name. Not how I pictured this booty call.
How do people deal with hangovers? I literally want to eat my own face.
It took years to rebuild my brains forcefield against your charm and I feel like u seal team 6'd ur way in again and caught my common sense sleeping on post
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
I don't know what happened. His phone, shirt, shoes, and the condom wrapper are here but he isn't. I don't even know how to get a hold of him right now
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
I forgot about snapchatting a pic of us, but I remember flossing with your hair.
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
Hey do you remember me?
You were the giant banana I had sex with... how could i forget?
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
Randomize