He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
You probably havent been upstairs if you think that the microwave missing its door is bad
he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
I kept trying to give you water and you kept spitting it back at me. You looked like a camel. People were staring
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
I walked into the kitchen and twelve of them were just staring at the oven. Freshmen are the weirdest drunks ever.
I'm glad I booty called you last night. It was nice to see you and talk, in between all the sex...
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
"just because you look like a short version of scarlet johanson does not mean I would immediately fuck you" that was the single.most difficult thing to say. but seriously I don't want the roots of the whore tree anywhere near my junk.
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
I was so drunk last night I couldn't see faces, only from the shoulders down.
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
And by "have lunch together" you mean me giving you a blow job in the back of your Tahoe, right?
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