i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
A lady just asked me if you "seat yourselves" here at qdoba. I told her yea and she has been sitting at a table waiting for someone to take her order for 25 mins.
Apparently I mistakenly called the hair club for men at 3am... they called me back this morning.
Explain it like you would if you were talking to a 5 yo
Wait no, like you would to a stoned high school freshman.
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
can we just pause for one second and address the fact that balls were out last night
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
I don't want sex or anything I just really need someone to appreciate how shiny my hair is
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
Your clever response has earned you a blow job this week
Just had a threesome with a married couple.
Stop living my dream.
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
I'm just going to tell you this I knocked up your girlfriend. I didn't mean to I thought it was somebody else I wasn't drunk but it was dark.
The truth is better her than my wife.
Randomize
