im pretty sure i tried to attack the vending machine last night
lol who won
well im in the hospital right now so u tell me
When you told me you were coming to my show, I didn't know you were bringing Satan and Brokeback Mountain with you.
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
My porch is a mess of peanut butter and tostitos...thanks for that.
He tried peeing out of the sunroof.
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
I don't think you should say "suck my dick" and then proclaim to be a messiah, of any sort.
But he's super into Jesus and I'm the devil. So we weren't meant to be
I wasn't even hungover I was just mourning my dignity
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
He is farting the alphabet right now. In the goddamned restaurant. You don't get to recommend men anymore. Or restaurants for that matter.
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