If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
Stop making Mac and cheese and sit on his face. FINISH HIM
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
Flatmate got laid for the first time in 3 years. I'm baking a cake.
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
We are horrible
Yeah but we're also awesome
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
Here's a tip: do NOT chant "MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS." during sex because the Packers won against the Giants.
Please tell me I did not drink enough whiskey to think that having sex with my boyfriend while his best friend was on the floor next to us was a good idea.
i need to get drunk because i'm an angry sober
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
Randomize
