I'm at a Mexican Walmart. Wish you were here.
Katie Perry lied, you can't just wake up and shake the glitter off your clothes.
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
Just warning you the last time I had captain Morgan I gave a blow job to a guy that looked like Jesus.
Pitting the remainder of the bottle against my hangover. I'm expecting an all out cage match for my soul and wellbeing.
Rick just drank rum out of a dog bowl after a dog already drank out of it.
My mouth is so dry that I'm about to put a straw in a jar of Vaseline and chug. This all addi diet definitely has its ups and downs.
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
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